New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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