wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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