Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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