He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
This is the high leading the old right now
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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