I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
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