"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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