i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
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