yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize