remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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