Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize