Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
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