It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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