Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
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