What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
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We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
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We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
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