i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
