Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
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