yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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