Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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