Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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