I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
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