I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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