I want to have your abortion
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
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We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
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I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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