Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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