Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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