you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize