this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize