i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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