i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Randomize