Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
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