Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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