thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
either way he was missing a nipple.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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