I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize