Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize