somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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