Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
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It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
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If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
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