Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
"it" just moved
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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