Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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