im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize