Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize