I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize