All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
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Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
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All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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