ya dads aren't the best wingmen
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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