why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize