your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize