It's Friday. Sex?
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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