I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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