trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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