when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize