C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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