I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
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